Thursday, October 25, 2007

24 - Jack Bauer Quotes

I literally fell off my chair, when i read these. They are just too funny.

Get all the quotes @
http://community.gencon.com/forums/thread/73041.aspx

These are a few of my favorites : (the ones in bold are really good acc. to me)
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When bad things happen to good people, its probably fate. When bad things happen to bad people, it’s probably Jack Bauer.

The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.

The 2007 budget for the US Military covers Jack Bauer, two pistols and four billion rounds of ammunition.

MTV once tried to 'Punk' Kiefer Sutherland by staging a robery in a store. Sutherland smiled and pulled out his SIG and shot 3 actors in the head. This is why there was a new cast on Punk'd after season one.

If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.

Jack Bauer can break anyone and anything, but he will always break the protocol first.

Most pilots need 5,000 feet of runway to land a plane. Jack Bauer needs 100 feet and a gun.

Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.

Jack Bauer is the only human in the world with the ability to make Chloe O'Brien drop the personality disorder and patch him through.

Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.

It's no use crying over spilt milk... Unless that was Jack Bauer's milk. Oh you are so
screwed.

Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.

When someone asks him how his day is going, Jack replies, "Previously, on 24..."

There is the right way, the wrong way, and the Jack Bauer way. It's basically the right way but faster and more deaths.

Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.

The truth may hurt, but it doesn't hurt as much as Jack Bauer.

Don't ever ask Jack Bauer what is going on. He'll explain in the car.

Jack Bauer doesn't take fingerprints, he takes fingers.

You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink.

When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Jack Bauer.

Jack Bauer has been to Mars. That's why there's no life on Mars.

Jack Bauer's family threw him a surprise birthday party when he was a child. Once.

Jack Bauer could get off the Lost island in 24 hours.

7 comments:

Zup said...

Yeah those were good for a laugh. I'm surprised you havent gotten more comments.

Anonymous said...

These were witty. Especially enjoyed them in light of Day 7 just getting started. Looks like the writer's strike has paid off for 24 as the plot is dynamic and the dialogue engaging.

Singularity said...

Very true. 24 Fans love these quotes and the new season seems to be awesome !

Why an anonymous posting though ?

kim said...

Love them. Love Jack. I think that this season is starting off excellently after the disappointment of season 6 and the frustration of a year's wait (I am SUCH an addict).

Pauline said...

hahaha love this!

Anonymous said...

This cracked me up, brilliant quotes!

Erik Muir said...

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. And on the seventh day Jack Bauer turned to God and said, "I'll take it from here."